College...

So day two of dorm life is officially under way here at Western Washington University. First night, our window cannot close all the way. And just my luck, a train roars by practically every hour, blasting that fucking horn as if dozens of small children were frollicking on the tracks and the train was issuing a warning. Seriously, what are the trains honking at? Is it really necessary to do that non-stop through the entire fucking county?

This is abuse of horn privileges, if you ask me. You know those asshole train conductors probably have some god complex and get off by rousing an entire city from slumber. Issue the warning, alert your presence to everybody, and then shut the fuck up, trains.

What else...oh yeah, the food here is rad. I had me some roasted beans and tofu on some rice last night with a huge salad drenched in thousand island dressing. And for breakfast I massacred some hashbrowns with eggs, flapjacks and orange juice. I'm eating like royalty here. Western might as well take it to the next level and hire all the hot chicks on campus to wear bikinis and hand-feed us all of our meals.

My sleeping situation is terrible right now. I have an old, run-down spring mattress. At certain areas of the bed the springs dig into my body and it's just torture. I can only assume the damage done to this bed was the result of years of banging taking place upon it. Not exactly comforting, but maybe at some point I can add to the legacy of the mattress. Ladies, if you're reading this, you can become a part of history. Feel free to ask.

The roommates are cool. Yup.

The info fair was a frenzy. The chaos was comparable to piranhas swarming bloody waters after a kill. Apparently people do not know how to stick to one direction, because there were dumbasses everywhere working against the grain of the flow of traffic, and zig-zagging through boothes like idiots. Seriously, it isn't that hard to just circle around Red Square. There's no need trying to play connect-the-dot using the boothes. Assholes.

Well, that's all I have to say concerning college so far. Horror stories are sure to come as the semester progresses. Stay tuned.